Spinwork Blog

It’s about 10:30 in the morning and it feels like its about midnight. Chalk it up to my World Issues professor deciding it would be a good idea to watch Wall-E at 8:00 in the morning instead of a final. Not that I’m complaining–Wall-E’s one of my all-time favorite movies, but one I like to watch after a long Saturday, or when I want to wallow in the movie’s unique atmosphere, not just after waking up from an involuntary all-nighter. The upside is I’m currently blessed with that clarity that comes with 2AM writing sessions, where everything makes that sleepy kind of sense and you’re less inhibited to pursue your muse through the pearly avenues of her perpetual acid trip.

I finally finished Atlas Shrugged last night after a near three-month struggle. I say struggle because Atlas isn’t one of those books you read–it’s one you excavate with heavy explosives. Where the effort in reading it was is difficult to say. It’s a long sucker, to be certain (1168 pages), complete with everything I was taught not to do as a writer–from long, expository passages (60 pages, long) to dragging explanations of character’s morals, sexualities, and stoicism against emotional trauma. Still, when it pulled me in, it pulled me in good, and hundreds of pages would fly by in a blink. I wouldn’t quite say its a page-turner, because there are times I had to reread entire passages with a feeling of, “wait, what the fuck did he/she just say?” The reward of being able to fist-pump on my favorite characters in the end was amazing, though (DANNESKJOLD! REARDEN!).

The book is, without question, one of the most intense, overwrought, annoying, hair-tearing, scalp-shredding, bitter-laughter inducing, inspiring, life-changing books I’ve ever read. There’s something masochistic about reestablishing my reading habit with two, 200,000+ word books in quick succession–books that have earned me groans of “you’re reading Ayn Rand? But she’s so conservative/republican/economically fascist/idealist/reactionary, and her prose sucks.” I don’t read books for their agenda. Every writer has an agenda. I have an agenda. I don’t force it down peoples’ throats, and I don’t swallow when writers try to force theirs down mine.

Virtually every criticism I’ve heard about both Atlas and Fountainhead focused on Rand’s views, and I agree. Rand is an idealist, and her opinion is conservative past realism. Her prose is clunky–although, in her defense, English wasn’t her first language–and not something I’d recommend to someone looking to improve their writing. What hooked me was her focus on character and her portrayals of the ideal man (and woman, in the case of Dagny Taggart), which, although hyperbolic and utopian as the rest of Rand’s themes, had enough “real” for me to latch onto, and sufficient “unreal” for me to suspend my disbelief. In a way, I think it was that hyperbole that drew me in. You can learn a lot from exaggeration. After all, it’s more or less the core of comedy. Apparently it works well in fiction, too.

In the end, its difficult to put into words just what the effect was. There were a lot of parts in the book where I’d read a scene or speech and be like, “I FEEL LIKE THAT SOMETIMES,” or “DAMNIT, I’VE HAD PEOPLE PULL THAT ON ME,” or at times, be  awed that such a complex story could be held together with such ostensible simplicity. Maybe the message and the meaning is meant to be mine alone.

That said, I’m continuing my reading extravaganza. I don’t know what I’m going to read next, but I like blogging about it. It gives me something to talk about that isn’t creatively whorish and expository (a use for this blog!). On my list right now are Slaughterhouse-Five, Anna Karenina, Les Miserables, Scarlett Letter and Stranger in a Strange Land. I should also look into finishing Snow Crash, but I haven’t been in the mood for sci-fi lately.

My semester’s over as of yesterday, closed with a read-and-edit of my friend Will’s book, Imperium, which he’s been working on about as long as I’ve been working on Hellion. It’s been really interesting seeing where he’s come from and gone with his stuff, and I’m really starting to see his story and concepts coming together, which is exciting. I’m just hoping he sticks to it. *stern look*

With the semester closed, the time’s come to do more work on Cloudnigh, which continues to stumble and swell in the relative semblance of growth. I haven’t done any actual writing on it in a few days, as the story seems to be demanding some background notes. Its sort of nice that I can finally identify the feeling of “what the fuck am I doing?” as a reminder to check my notes and see what I’m actually trying to say. When I look at the inspiration of my process, its sort of weird to see where I’ve drawn it from: Ayn Rand, Jonathon Stroud, Phillip Pullman, J.K. Rowling, Herman Melville, Fred Gallagher, my dad. I guess I make it work in my own way. Only now am I starting to realize how adaptable you have to be to plan a project. I’ve approached Cloudnigh in such a different way than I approached Lanternfly.

In that vein, I’m still working on Lanternfly–not as actively as I used to, but still. I’ve got a long term plan for that, and for Shadower. The gig right now is trying to execute Cloudnigh as best I can and see what comes of it as an online project. I’m finally at this place of relative confidence (90% acceptance of failure, 5% raw excitement, 5% stubbornness) where I can start to realistically plot out my course for the next year. With luck, that course will be Cloudnigh.

We shall see.

Thanks for reading!

Spinner Books & Reading, Cloudnigh, Daily Blogging, Hellion, Shadower 2009, Atlas Shrugged, ayn rand, Cloudnigh, fountainhead, Hellion, inspirating, Lanternfly, Rants, reading, reading list, Shadower

Writing dramatic structure into an extended piece of writing is one of the most excruciating aspects of the process for me. When you look at it, two, or even five pages a day, five days a week is such a pain. You start, you stop, you laugh, you cry, you go through monsoons of inspiration and salty droughts while your life breezes on around you and your unconscious, the refuse filtering through the cracks.

I don’t pretend to have an unconscious any more or less complex or vulnerable than the next jack, but there’s something annoying about being on the precipice of finishing the first major milestone in the process and hitting a brick wall. Its not the first time this has happened to me. Writing my third book, Shadower, saw me hit a rather profound pile of this about six paragraphs from the end, stalling me two months. You gotta wonder if it’s you in moments like this, especially when you run into it on two separate occasions in two very different books two years apart.

For those who follow my twitter will know chapter 25 was a bit of a pain in the ass to write. Anyone who’s racing to finish something for whatever reason will know how giant a deadline looks when you’ve gotta redo a part of the peice three times. I guess I can chalk that up as another learning experience–rewriting a full 15  pages 3 times in 48 hours. Its not that I don’t know what I’m writing–or that my muse is an emotionally disturbed, bipolar slumbitch who requires heavily bribery to operate properly–but that there’s so much other shit going on. Papers, projects, more papers, housing selection, class selection, half the people at work bailing for new jobs. it weighs on you after a while.  But this is where stubbornness comes in to play, I’m learning, and although I probably won’t get 26 done til Thursday night, I know I can get everything settled by Sunday. Just gotta push, push, push.

I’m happy to say that Lanternfly has held together as a  much better than any of my other efforts. Its not perfect by any means, and it won’t be for a long while, but the story’s there, and I feel like its definitely workable into something I can finally finish and show people. I feel like I’ve finally found a process I can parry with–one that hasn’t evolved all that much since the Writing a Novel Guide I posted sometime ago (minus the outline bit). There are still things to tweak (I’m not sure if my going a draft without any sort of edits are going to work in the long run–I have a lot of shit to rework in this book), but I’m liking the majority of what I’ve set down. Also, Advanced Creative Writing has been very helpful with research methods. I hope to keep that going.

In other news, my 22nd birthday was on Tuesday. I’m at that age now where birthdays have really lost their charm. People keep asking me if I did anything special. Aside from jury duty forms (FUCK), and a nice card from my grandmother, I endured two classes and went to a Hibachi place with my friends where the chef set onions on fire and sculpted a dollop of rice into a stunted choad with balls. Maybe when I’m 25, or 30, I’ll do something exciting. For now, I’d like to focus on graduating.

Thanks for reading.

Spinner Daily Blogging, Hellion, IS 2009, Shadower IS2009, Lanternfly, Shadower

For those of you who visit the writing-void (WORKING ON THAT) that is my Spinwork portfolio, I updated a few of the pages, added an FAQ, cut the Endoflux page, and added more detailed sections and pictures for the Lanternfly and Shadower sections. Still working on the blog layout, and possibly, a forums (I have the stuff installed, I just need to skin it and actually figure out if there’s even a point/any time).

Backing up to the Endoflux thing for a second. Why’s Endoflux gone? I’m not cutting the story–but it’s just not on my list of in-progress projects right now. At the moment, Lanternfly is my 100% priority. Hopefully I’ll get to Shadower sometime before 2010. But Endoflux–I really don’t have time for it right now. It’s a great idea, and has a lot of potential. But I’ve got other stuff I want to write, so that’ll have to wait. And that’s that.

In other news, I got to change the water filters at work today. Seriously one of the most entertaining moments at Starbucks ever. First of all, it gave me every reason to never drink unfiltered water ever again. New York/Vermont water is fairly clean, but looking at a brownish water filter after three months of use and you’ll actually realize there IS shit floating around in there. Haha, fuck.

This is a lot later than I’ve been up in a while. Funny, I’ve actually been sleeping lately.

Back into Lanternfly tomorrow. Thanks for reading!

Spinner Daily Blogging, Endoflux Theory, Hellion, IS 2009, Shadower, Site-related Endoflux hiatus, FAQ, Lanternfly, Shadower, Spinwork, work

Inspiration is like a winding river infested with beavers who build dams like coke addicts do lines.

I find it really funny that I spent six months in development on Twice Born and I’m still more ready to tackle The Madonna Lily and Shadower than I am the big one. Then again,  I am looking at planning three books fairly completely before I start, which is daunting for anyone. Perhaps I’ve second-guessed myself. The best way to take anything is slowly, something I’ve learnt the hard way over the past year. Much of my slump had to do with trying to do things too quickly. It was probably wrong of me trying to–once again–set a release date on my work. Never again, I say! And this time, I’m sticking to it.

Boy, do the days go. Around this time last year, I was writing the last chapter of the second draft of Shadower and trying to rekindle my interest in Salamander. It really was to no avail. 2007 really wasn’t that hot a year for me writing-wise–not in the way 2006 was (Hellion, Salamander and Shadower in one year. Holy hell.). I really should do some sort of writing-related “New Years Resolution” thing. Like not being a “ashf;alsf” about projects and tagging my blog posts (seeing that tag thing empty depresses me for some reason). Maybe I’ll tag this post. Yeah. I think I will.

So. Resolutions. I resolve not to over exert myself on my writing in 2008. I resolve not to set any release dates when I don’t even have anything written yet. I also resolve not to be such a draft-miser, and give crits to the guys on SE and IF once in a while. I also resolve to finally do that goddamn layout for SE I keep telling Julie I’ll do. I’d resolve to read Nightbane by LCC, but I have a feeling he’d hunt me down and give me multiple paper cuts with the manuscript if I didn’t follow through xD. I don’t feel like taking that risk, Lionel, sorry xDxD. I also resolve to get a girlfriend neuter myself.

And in other news, I’ve begun the hapless “etching” phase on The Madonna Lily–you know, that lovely part where you take all those random threads of story in your head and put them on paper, then figure out which ones you want to use or not. I remember when I was doing this for Salamander. I had so much fun, especially since I was doing it on an intense sugar high on an Amtrak train at 11P at night. It was epic. Any way, I’ve figured out some pretty loose stuff about how I want the story to go, and a few ideas about which aspects of the screenplay version I want to keep. I know I want to start actually writing it over break, but I’m not sure if I’ll be able to. I’d still like to get And the Silence Screamed and McKenna done before I really churn out anything else. Then again, it’d feel awesome to sink my teeth into something new.  Not much has been done on those two short stories since my last post.

With Christmas in traction, hopefully I’ll be able to get some stuff down. In the meanwhile, I hope you all (those who actually read my rambling shit xD) are having a happy holidays. Keep safe and eat lots ^^;

Spinner Uncategorized And the Silence Screamed, McKenna, New Year Resolutions 2008, Reminiscing, Shadower, The Madonna Lily